I bought some Nair on my last shopping trip. It’s helpful to me, though it’s always a bit odd to buy. Not as odd as buying makeup (outside of Ulta—those people have always been very cool with me), and, oddly, not as odd as trying to buy deodorant when I go grocery shopping.

It’s the sort of thing I don’t think very much about. I lived in a quite cool climate before my move out here in the West. I also just don’t sweat all that much. But now, with fitness classes, certain things are necessary.

I don’t like the manly-man world of deodorant/anti-perspirants for men. It’s in the same realm as calling something a man-bag or a man-bun. Men’s deodorant has to say MEN on it for some obnoxious reason. And be dark colours. And smell like musk, which is rather gross. I don’t identify with any of that ridiculousness, the same way I don’t respond to ads for razors featuring jet fighters or Muhammad Ali. So I’ve tried to go with something a bit on the feminine side of neutral. I bought a stick of Degree. I like it. I’ll probably give Dove a shot here in the near future as well, since I like their soaps so much and all.

The odd thing to me? It seems to work better than the stuff for men on me. Maybe that’s all in my head.

But it’s one of those areas where we have such heavily gendered marketing. It shouldn’t be too much of a surprise that this comes from the world of personal grooming. It’s like a last bastion of gender silliness alongside the pink aisle at the toy store.

I know I’m different. I know I’m not normal or mainstream. I’m fine with that. I have a wardrobe that is much closer now to where I want to be, my gender expression getting closer to my gender identity. But it’s the binary areas of gender, like with deodorant, that I don’t quite know how to navigate yet.

Or how to pop on the checkout conveyor belt.