J and I were joking that we should go to her husband’s holiday party together if he was planning to work through it. It was mostly us being mischievous with an idea, but it also got me thinking about when I would be more willing to be more open about really expressing femme, especially more formal femme fashion.

I own a number of dresses. I like them, and I look better in some than others. The lack of breasts throws off a few of them, but there isn’t much I’m willing to do about that. I have several skirts as well, though if I’m deciding I want to go out as femme, I pick out a pair of my women’s pants and a nice top. I don’t go full dress and heels with a purse. Yet.

But that’s where the thought of this party went. You see, J and I are going to go to Rollercon next year, the convention for all things roller derby. I get to actually visit Vegas (and knowing me, once is probably enough) and do some window shopping because there’s stuff I really want to window-shop there. And it’s time with J away from any family pressures.

They have a formal event for this called the black and blue ball. You have to wear those colours or they very much can keep you from entering. The plan is for me to go in a dress, tights, and heels, and J’s going to go in a shirt and tie. This is next July, and it will be the first full formal femme outing for me. It already makes me a bit nervous.

The idea of doing this at the holiday party is more amusing than anything. It would go over terribly, as would any possibility of me going to this party. J’s husband, suffice it to say, doesn’t like me very much.

I’ve told a number of people that they’ll know when I’m fully comfortable expressing femme when I carry a purse for a night out here in town. I think, even if I were biologically a woman, I would be uncomfortable wearing tights and heels here, so that’s not really in the conversation. At least for the bars we have around here. So I’m trying to decide how close to that point I’m getting. Am I that comfortable?

I’m getting more bold, that’s for sure. We’ll see about comfort.