To follow up on something I wrote the other day, I do wonder how I’ll look if I go through with hormone replacement therapy. I feel like I look pretty good now (at least on the bottom half), and I wonder what reordering things with hormones will do.

Because there are no guarantees to how the end of this process will turn out. That my legs will continue to look fabulous while the rest of me becomes more femme. That my face will only soften the way I want while maintaining me. That I won’t balloon.

It makes me nervous because I would like to be able to see what the after is going to be. That makes it more worth it to me, even if that’s a bit on the vain side. It would make me more femme, and that alone is worth it. It would make facial and body hair go away (by and large), and that’s fantastic. And it would change my shape, which I want.

If nothing else, perhaps this is motivation to be in as good of shape as possible. Then I can roll the dice and see what comes up.

We’ll see. March 1, 2018 is tentatively my deadline for making a decision. I’m leaning yes to HRT, but there’s a long way to go. Including talking with family.

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