I read a bit as I’m waking up in the morning, usually just news on my phone. I wake up very slowly, like the last vestiges of dreaming take a very long time to go away, so it’s a bit of cardio for my noggin.

One of the things I do is look up transgender on Google and then hit the News tab to see what’s going on out there in the world that I might want to talk about here. I did that this morning, and there were a couple of articles that stood out to me, though I’m not going to link to them here.

One was from the conservative CNS News, an opinion piece where the author didn’t know the difference between sex and gender. That was nice, and the commenters took that up. Lots of being called mentally ill and a pervert. Fun.

The one that really got me, though, was from Fox News. I should know better, mind you, but in Google News, the headline gets the attention rather than the source. This was a followup on the restaurant in OKC with the odd and perhaps menacing bathroom sign. Whee.

That spawned this exchange in the comments:

Commenter 1: “If you really do not know your gender, you are not transgendered, you are crazy.”

Commenter 2: “It would be better had they not been born”

Commenter 3: “There is no such thing as a Transgender, it is a made up perversion from perverted liberals!”

Commenter 4: “I had no problems with gays until they decided to do chest bumps with the normal society. Do not start you will not win manly men will knock you on your butts. You want to forcibly close any business that does not agree with you. Supposed we forcibly closed every business that does. You people would have a fit.”

I don’t worry about being accepted by most of the population. The thing is, the opinions above? They’re rather prevalent in our society. These are people who think I shouldn’t exist, or if I do, that I have a mental disorder or worse. Anything that contradicts that narrative becomes a liberal PC thought-police conspiracy.

The bit that gets me is being called crazy. I’ve had my share of mental issues, but they’re unrelated to my gender identity. They manifested through depression issues and suicidal tendencies. But what is the line between being a certain way and being mentally ill? This changes with each edition of the DSM guidelines, so I don’t find much comfort in that fluidity.

Am I mentally ill? I’m going to have to accept that many people will think so. I’m going to have to accept that I’ll have a bit of a target on my back once I start hormones. Yeah, that’s kind of scary.