I know there are movements afoot to get an X category for gender on official documents, like passports, licenses, etc. I like this. I think this is an important thing, and I support it.

That’s not what I’m talking about today, though. Instead, I’m trying to sort through the conflicting emotions of figuring out which label I would take for myself.

For the last couple of years, I would have opted for an X. I have been calling myself non-binary, and I still don’t think I fit perfectly into either gender bucket. The fact that we delineate this so strongly, especially with the different flavours of gender and their frequent lack of relation to biological sense, is something I hope we can stem the tide of in the future.

Today? Today I think I’ll have to go for F when the time comes. This is perhaps the simpler way, maybe even the easier way out, but when I’m so far to one end of the gender spectrum, well, there’s only so much fighting one person can do.

I plan to change my name—first, middle, and last—and when that time comes, I’ll change my documents to say F as well.